Bad Baby Names--Do you hate your child???

After watching Harry Potter the other night, I had a semi-revelation. If I ever married a guy with the last name Potter, I would feel it necessary to name my son Harry, not really because I am a Harry Potter fan (which I am), but just because it would be too perfect. I don't know if that makes me a nerd or not, but how often would this happen. I'm sure he would be made fun of for the rest of his life. I think it would be terribly fun to call him Harry Potter (said with the overly British accent). Would that make me an evil parent?

This got me thinking about names parents give their children. Many celebrities have done much worse than Harry Potter. One of the worst I can think of is Pilot Inspektor, yes with a K, really??!?! So, I submit a list of other wacky/crazy/bad celebrity baby names:
Zuma- Gwen Stefani
Apple and Moses- Gwenyth Paltrow (MOSES--are you KIDDING ME?)
Barron- Donald Trump
Kal-El- Nic Cage (is it okay to name your son after Superheroes?)
Moon Unit and Dweezil- Frank Zappa
Fifi Trixibelle, Heavenly Tiger Lily, Little Pixie- Paula Yates
Satchel- Mia Farrow/Woody Allen (what, "Briefcase" didn't sound good enough?)
Audio Science- Shannyn Sossamon (I can't even respond to this! What do you call him?)
Moxie Crimefighter, Zolten- Penn Jillette
Seven Sirius- Erykah Badu (she must have seen the Seinfeld episode and Harry Potter!)

The list could go on forever...these kids are lucky they are "rich" and know other celebrity kids with crazy names, otherwise you know they would just get their butts kicked every day at school. I think there should be some kind of naming restrictions/limitations imposed. And no naming kids after fruit...

Anyway, I have to admit, after thinking about the Harry Potter thing, I may understand a LITTLE bit more why people name their kids such crazy things. It's kinda fun and you can end up calling them whatever you want. Name him Harry Potter and call him Joe or something. Just a final piece of advice: when you go to name your child, ask yourself, Do I hate my child?

I sleep with a hammer next to my bed....

I have an irrational fear of the dark. I hate not being able to see what is around me, or if someone is sneaking up on me. (Why someone would be sneaking up on me, I don't really know, but it could happen!) I can’t remember when exactly this happened, but even as a 20-something year old, I hate the dark and sleep with a hammer next to my bed…too uncomfortable for under the pillow. Some people ask, why a hammer? Won’t that be messy? I feel that too many things can go wrong with a gun. Plus, I don’t have to shoot to kill, I can knock out a few knee caps, smash the fingers….plus it’s easier to use. There is absolutely no chance of a misfire/other mechanical malfunction with a hammer.

But back to my fear of the dark… At my parent’s house in CA, I refuse to go outside when it is dark. Once the sun is down, I am inside for the night. I won’t even go on the front porch, opening the door is pushing it as well. On the occasions that I return home after dark, I RUN into the house, never looking back. I imagine I look like a COMPLETE idiot...it's almost painful to think about.

The sad thing is that I am almost more afraid of the “supernatural” than someone actually attacking me( I blame Hollywood and Jared Padalecki/Jensen Ackles for that), although the hammer is for intruders. And now, I have a double barrel shotgun in my closet, just in case the hammer isn’t enough. I don’t know if I would actually use this against an intruder, but it does make me feel better knowing it is there each night. So, to would be intruders: Trespassers will be shot or bludgeoned to death by hammer. You were warned.

My dream is to have a '67 Impala with an arsenal in the trunk like in the picture... by the way, the pic is from Supernatural, of course!